Hey friend! I’m sure I’m not the first to tell you, but no matter how many inspirational videos you watch or how many times you write down your goals in your planner, you’ll never achieve your desires and goals if you’re inadvertently sabotaging your own success. Self-sabotaging is any action or inaction that is disputing any of your goals. When we’re stuck in life, sometimes we know exactly why. Like eating a piece of cake when we are trying to lose weight. And other times, we just can’t figure out why we’re in a slump. We ask ourselves, why aren’t things getting better? Why can’t I lose weight? Why do I keep struggling?
And for many of us, it is because we have developed certain bad habits that we don’t even know we’re doing. But in result, they are sabotaging our happiness, personal growth, and success. Since these bad habits can be hard to identify, I want to share 4 ways you may be sabotaging your own success in today’s blog post. To show you how to overcome these bad habits and help you find your success!
1. You’re passing up new opportunities
One way you may be sabotaging your own success is that you’re passing up on new opportunities and continuing to stay in your comfort zone. And, you may not be fully aware that you’re even doing this. Do you ever find yourself shrinking your world and never venturing out? For instance, do you only remain to do the things you are good at or the things you can get done quickly? A lot of people do this in order to feel successful and content without having to leave their comfort zone and risk any form of rejection or judgment.
The problem with this is, although you feel safe and secure having a level of success within your comfort zone, that feeling won’t last forever when trying to achieve your passions and dreams. Whether it be in your career, education, or even weight loss goals. The effect of playing it safe all of the time will eventually cause you to stop feeling satisfied with your personal growth. Because honestly, it’s nearly impossible to continue growing without taking a leap outside of your comfort zone and taking risks.
When you’re passing up on new opportunities and shrinking your world, you are not giving yourself the chance to grow, learn, be challenged, and to have your voice heard by the world. All and all, you forgo any chances to become your version of successful when you say no to opportunities that can help you grow and change for the better. Try forcing yourself to do something beyond your comfort zone. Don’t let the fear of failure keep you from trying to achieve your goals. If you don’t allow yourself to try, how would you ever know what the future outcome could possibly be?
2. You’re keeping yourself overwhelmed
I think many of us can relate to this one in many areas of our lives. Especially when you are trying out a new habit or trying to stick a New Year’s resolution. One reason why you may be struggling to maintain this new habit or new goal is that you are keeping yourself in a constant state of overwhelm and anxiousness. Which can be tough to overcome because you may feel that your state of overwhelm is caused by things you simply cannot control. In society today, we all have more responsibilities along with an infinite amount of choices and distractions. So additionally, I know that feeling/being overwhelmed is not only dis-empowering, it’s also exhausting.
In moments of anxiousness and overwhelm, we need to remember that feeling overwhelmed is a state of being. It has more to do with how you manage your time and energy than the actual content in your life. Letting go of the overwhelm begins with how you feel and how you are managing your thoughts. That’s why practicing mindfulness and always being aware of your thoughts and feelings are so important! Because only then are you to shift your energy and mindset.
For me, I feel most overwhelmed when I am disorganized.
This goes for my work-life, my education, and for my every day/social life. If I feel as though I can’t keep up with my to-do list, or my space is a mess, or I’m committing to way more than I should – that’s when I feel most overwhelmed. But, luckily, the first step to overcoming this is to acknowledge it!
Personally, to shift the overwhelm, I have found that stopping what I am doing at the moment and giving myself space and time to slow down really helps. That way, I am able to see the bigger picture (maybe a week or two in advance) and focus on little bits at a time. Along with that, I’ve been really trying to limit my commitments as well, if they simply do not work for me. You probably know by now, if you have read my other posts, that I am a huge people pleaser! However, having too much going on at once has caused me to set really unrealistic weekly goals and it really drains my energy by the end of the week.
Related Post: “How To Get Out Of The Need To Be “Busy” Mindset”
3. You’re holding out for a hero
This one is probably the most devastating, yet liberating, truths that I have had to face. But yet, it is such a must-needed piece of advice that everyone should hear and take in. Simply because the moment you realize this, your life and your overall mindset will truly change. It is that…no one coming to save you. It’s hard to hear, but it is the truth. No one is coming to fix you or do anything for you because nobody else is as invested in your life, your choices, your happiness, and your dreams as much as you!
Nobody else is going to be as impacted by what you do in your life as you will be. It is your responsibility as a human being to take responsibility for that and for what you do. It is nobody else’s job to live your life for you, because they have their own lives to live. This doesn’t mean that there won’t be people to walk beside us on our journey, to support us, to help us, or to encourage us along the way. But it is not their job or their responsibility to live life for us, to do the things for us, or to take care of us.
And we all need to accept that this is truly a good thing!
This means that you do not have to wait anymore for someone to save you or give you permission to go after what you want. It means that you no longer have to sit and wait as you let life pass you by! You get to wake up every day, get up, and go after your desires and get the life that YOU want.
Ultimately, it all goes down to what you think of this. Do you find this to be more devastating? Or do you feel a sense of empowerment, independence, and liberation? Or do you find it to be a little bit of both? It’s a tough one! But the more you work hard to break through these barriers of bad habits, the more you will overcome any of the ways that you may be sabotaging your own success.
4. You’re waiting until you are “happy“
This is a tough one that we all do! Now, I really want to make sure to mention that I’m not talking about those who are currently going through any grief, loss, or those in a time of trama! If you are going through something painful and traumatic at this moment, I am not talking about this. Because I truly understand how life gets flipped upside down when something unexpected and traumatic happens. So please don’t think I’m demeaning anything that you’re going through! 💛
I am talking about the times in between. When we are sitting around waiting for life to get good, waiting for ourselves to become happy, or waiting for that “perfect moment.” Or perhaps we are doing things in hopes that one day life will get good. This is for those who tell themselves, “when I look this certain way,” “when I have a certain amount of success,” “when I have this much money in my bank account” or “when I have the perfect something,” then I am going to be happy. It’s the plight of the “when I have…” or “when I look like…” or “when I accomplish…” then I will allow myself to be happy.
Then I will allow myself to feel good.
I understand that this can be challenging because many of us feel like waiting until “the perfect time” is actually smart and the greatest way to set ourselves up for success in the future. However, in reality, waiting for the perfect time or waiting until you are confident, ready, or happy is simply just a feel-good excuse to keep procrastinating time and time again.
It is so important to remember that even those people who look a certain way, have found success, have a lot of money, or have found their happiness – all still have problems in their life. That “stuff” you are waiting to receive from the world does not solve all of the problems. I know it’s cliché, but happiness is not a destination, it is a decision. If you cannot be happy right now, while also still wanting to grow and learn, then you won’t be able to be happy when you get to where you want to officially be. You have already accomplished so many things that you thought you needed to accomplish in order to feel happy and good, yet, you’re still feeling dissatisfied with where you currently are. That’s because happiness is not a destination!
It is about being grateful and present in the process and the journey. We need to stop waiting to get somewhere. There is nowhere to get to that’s going to fill that need to be happy. Happiness is a decision that you choose to make every. single. day!
Which one do you find yourself unintentionally or intentionally doing the most?
For me personally, I think it was tip # 2, keeping myself overwhelmed too much and too often. But I would love to hear some of your thoughts in comments!
Great post! Love #4, so inspiring😍
Thank you so much Grace! 💛
All of your posts are so inspiring! I’m truly amazed reading all of these!! I’m learning and trying to build up my own confidence and happiness and I fe. I feel better every time I read these! I’m so proud of you for writing this last post,, I know this was hard and truly no one could read this without shedding a tear😢😘 so proud of you! So proud to be your mom💕
Love you! ❤️